I think as the wedding comes closer and closer, I'm getting more anxious, with planning and whatnot, along with questioning if I'm truly ready for this (going back and forth, back and forth, seemingly arguing with myself...)
Having difficult conversations with J... saddens me that we have more of those lately, but I do know that everytime, I come out learning more about God (& admiring J more and more). This time around, I saw the true weightiness of my own walk. Though I always knew that my own personal walk with God very much affect every aspect of my life and all the relationships around me, it's the first time I come to see that... I'm going to be a HUGE influence to my soontobe-husband's life (sort of a duh statement, but.. shocked me). So, if I'm not doing well in my walk, then he's going to be affected as well!! {the bright side though, is that I'll know when I'm doing well, he'll be benefitting from it as well =D}.
Anyhow, I should be reminded of the following (taken from girltalk):
When I try to find fulfillment in anything besides loving Christ and serving Him, I will only end up more frustrated and completely unfulfilled.
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